“I will be forever grateful to the staff [at St Christopher’s], for their kindness and love.”
Lindsey’s story
It’s over four years now since my dad, Brian Hill, died at St Christopher’s and I still miss him dreadfully.
There are always questions I’d like to ask him, and I’d also love to be able to tell him that we’re living life the way he taught us to – supporting and caring for others and never judging anyone.
I think more than anything I’ll never forget how he just wanted everyone to smile. He wanted to make people happy and so would do anything for anyone.
So, when I think back to my childhood in Herne Hill, I remember him working 12-14 hours a day as a black cab driver because he wanted to give my Mum, Jan, and my sister, Zoe, the best life possible.
He managed to save up and get a house in Spain. We’d spend the whole summer holidays there and Dad would come for four weeks. He absolutely loved being in the sun, reading and teaching kids to swim in the pool.
Apart from driving us to school in the cab every day, my sister and I always remember one time in Spain when we went to a water park when we were about 12 and 13.
The three of us went on this big slide and when we got to the bottom, we noticed it had burnt a hole in his trunks. He wasn’t bothered and just took us to the next one! It’s moments like that that just stay with you.
Having been brought up in Fulham he used to do most of his driving round Wandsworth and when it was quiet he and his mates would play cards in the back of the cab. Or he’d just read – he loved reading and just switching off. Then at night when he got home, he’d always finish the day with a whisky.
When eventually he had to stop work in his 70s because of his health, the grandkids became his focus. Both my sister and I have a girl and boy and Dad loved being with them. He’d help them with their homework, play games with them and watch films together.
I think Dad really helped my son become a man. Just recently when he was doing his driving theory test, he especially wore Dad’s watch.
“I didn’t think he’d want to go anywhere [other than St Christopher’s] as I could just see how comfortable he was.”
They saw him getting ill and going in and out of hospital. When he went to St Christopher’s it was just meant to be for respite. But as soon we got there, I said I didn’t think he’d want to go anywhere else as I could just see how comfortable he was and that proved to be true.
He had all the care he needed, and they literally couldn’t have treated him any nicer. He got a bed right by the window that he wanted, and they did so many other little things that you just don’t get anywhere else. The kids would come in and they’d do crafts downstairs and then we’d all have lunch together with Dad in the restaurant which was always lovely.
The other thing was that no one in the hospital had ever really told us how serious his illness was and explained exactly what it was like for Dad trying to breathe with his COPD.
The nurse opened my eyes and made me understand what he was going through.
We’ve had other experiences with hospices, and they are just absolutely amazing. I don’t think people realise until they go through it themselves quite how much they do. I will be forever grateful to the staff, for their kindness and love.
Although I used to help out with fun days at Sydenham Sports Club to raise money for St Christopher’s, I really wanted to do something myself.
Then I saw the Fun Walk come up and so my sister and a friend whose dad had also COPD and died last year, decided to do it. We walked 10 miles, really enjoyed it, raised over £1000 and would definitely do it again.
When we went to pick up the t-shirts for the Fun Walk that was the first time my mum, sister and I had been back to St Christopher’s. We all looked at each other and it brought back a lot of memories. We went to the chapel, wrote a memory and lit a candle. It was sad but also really lovely. We all still talk about him though which helps keep him alive.
If you, like Lindsey, would like to share your memories this Father’s Day, you can add to our dedicated Much Loved page
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